Yucatan 2014 Recap (Mexico)

My buddy, Neal, and I decided to knock some things off the bucket lists by visiting Mexico and Belize a few weeks back. Specifically, we wanted to tour Chichen Itza with an archaeologist and go snorkeling in the Blue Hole off the coast of Ambergris Caye. So Saturday, April 26, we were on our way down to fly into Cancun.

We arrived around 10pm, met up with our limo driver who was referred by my friend, Greg. As we drove in from the north end of the Hotel Zone, we didn't see much. Found this a little surprising. Where were the parties, happening bars, and Girls Gone Wild video crews? We arrived at our destination, Hotel Sotavento, which happened to be right across the way from the much-advertised Playboy Casino (literally, billboards every mile from the airport to the Hotel Zone for this place). We found our first hot spot of the trip. After checking in, we quickly made our way over... to a boarded-up complex with eviction notices written in Spanish. A confusing part of this was that the outdoor bar still seemed intact, with people even sitting there (maybe waiting for the nearby bus?) and everything still seemed brand new. The first night ended with me and Neal walking a mile or two south of the hotel to find a decent bar. A note: if you're staying outside of the main hub of the Hotel Zone, don't do this. Besides, the R-1 and R-2 take you right into that part of town... and it's only 9.50 pesos (about $0.80 USD). Night was a bust, it happens.

Next morning, we're out of the gate running. Turns out, Hotel Sotavento is located right near the Cancun Rotating Observation Deck. Went up, not only to take some great pictures, but to see where the heck we were in relation to everything else... and we were FAR. Would've taken us hours to walk to the closest bar the previous night. After our observing, we took the R-2 to Walmart (conveniently enough, R-2 buses have 'Walmart' labeled right on the windshield so you know) and got our supplies for the week. We had a little bit of a language barrier, but nothing Neal's charades for 'beach towel' couldn't solve. A little bit of beach research later, and we're off to the public beach in front of Coco Bongo. Had never seen water so blue... and warm. Like swimming in a salty bath tub (don't open your eyes unless you want death). Relaxed on the beach under our umbrellas for a few hours. Paradise. Everyone just having a good time, no 'bros' or any of those Jersey Shore types.

Upon arriving back at the hotel, we came to a tough decision. Where were we going to go for nightlife? Coco Bongo was enticing with its million of people dressed as Jim Carrey's The Mask, a friend from home had told me about Carlos and Charlie's, and my boss had told me about the waterslide at Senor Frog's. Since Senor Frog's seems to be a staple of all my vacations for some reason, that's where we went. And that's where we went everyday in Cancun afterward due to how incredible it was. After ordering a 67 oz. mojito and a bunch of local beers from Neal, we became the bartenders' best friends. With the move off the bayside, the waterslide is now gone (bummer) but it's been replaced with a nice stage and some sort of hanging harness for drinking games. Every so often, the guy staff will get up on stage and dance to 'Cotton Eyed Joe,' and free booze times and human bowling are abundant. I've never seen so much free booze in my life... no idea how they even stay in business. We had to get up early the next morning so we were wusses, but were definitely coming back in the near future... the next day. I get a call around 11pm when we're in bed. Who the hell is calling at this hour? 'Hey, Tim, this is Amigos. We'll be there at 5:45.' At first, I was devastated to hear this news. But later, I would be totally grateful.

We got picked up first in a van, then about an hour of picking up people in the Hotel Zone. Very diverse crowd, it was interesting. On our ride over to Chichen Itza, we learned about how it's illegal to eat iguanas at the site (so don't try... not like you would) and about the end of the world and how all the people who came up with that are idiots. The long count was really just the end of the Mayan Cosmic Day and the start of another... though we learned that this coming Cosmic Day will be a time where women become dominant ('so women, you only have 5200 years to set the world straight'). The site of Chichen Itza is quite incredible. The pyramid's structure signifies the many calendars the Mayans used (90 steps on each side with 5 at the top = 365 days, etc), and the alignment with the sun casts the serpeant (their agricultural god) shadow that makes its way down from the top of the pyramid on the Equinox to allow for good harvest. Think the coolest part of the pyramid was clapping around it. This is a must for any visitor, where you can clap at the base, sound travels up the steps, hits the temple at the top and echoes inside and projects outward to heard around the site. Those Mayans... also on site were a sacrificial cenote where they'd basically push boys who were high and drunk, a couple altars (virgins and such), and a great ball court where the loser would be decapitated and the winner would be sacrified as honor. Sure loved killing people in this civilization. On our way out, around 2pm, we noticed HUGE crowds. Line was out the door to get in and there were barely any decent photo ops in front of the pyramid. That's where Amigos wins with its 5:45 pickup time, so kudos.

When we got back, we decided to not take the bus to Belize and rent a car instead. Being as neither of us were great with manual, it was quite a risk... but ended up paying off. Dropped the car off at the hotel, took the R-1 back to Senor Frog's again and spent a good deal of time there, with Neal getting quite friendly with our new female bartender, Andy. A few of the previous night's workers were still there, 'Old Man' being a favorite of mine since he was a seasoned vet. The next morning, we left for Belize around 8am. What was painful about the Mexican highway... in order to get people to slow down through business or residential districts, they built random speed bumps. Sure some are labeled, but some had the signs ripped away. Sooo you're travelling 100km/h down the highway and you don't see one, that's the end of you haha. Another random thing to note: police stop points often. They don't slow traffic too bad, but they were daunting at first. We made it to Chetumal, MX with a little time to spare, problem was we got lost. After driving around for about an hour, I was convinced we were done for and we'd miss the boat to Belize. We parked in some random spot near a Sam's Club, prayed our guy wasn't going to get towed or ticketed, found a taxi, took a stab at saying 'Muelle Fiscal' in my best Spanish accent and made it to the pier.

Last note for anyone wanting to do this. If you intend on driving to Chetumal or taking the bus and cabbing it in order to get the Belizean ferries, just don't bother. Either take a plane from Cancun to Belize City then to San Pedro.. or drive to Corozal and take a Tropic Air plane from there to San Pedro. The ferry was one of the most painful things I've ever ridden on. It's essentially a speedboat with seating, and takes almost two hours to get there. And if you do take the plane, you're probably only spending about $25 extra than the ferry and you're saving tons of time. We dock at the main pier of San Pedro a few hours later, go through Immigration and Customs, which was an easy walkthrough, and walk onto the beaches of the island. Here for the second part of the trip.

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